How Judgmental Are You?

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I was recently told that I am a condescending, superior, patronizing, son of a bitch;

(1) because of a comment I made, and,

(2) because I work in the legal industry.

Furthermore, I’m not a team player. End quote.

Since most of the Prattle faithful doesn’t know me on a personal level, I can see how it would be difficult to agree or disagree as to one or the other. Doesn’t matter tho, because that’s not what I’m pondering.

Whether I am or am not is not something that keeps me awake at night. It is merely one person’s opinion. And just like the external opening of the rectum, everyone has one.

While I don’t take to heart such pejoratives, it has given me reason to pause & consider the motivations behind it. Mostly, I’m bewildered because anyone with more than two functioning brain cells is capable of behaving in such a manner under the appropriate circumstances.  Legal industry employment notwithstanding, all it takes is the right combination of opposing opinion & self-righteous indignation.

Why is it that certain individuals in society become personally offended by generalities? For example, if I were to say that the Human Resources profession was utterly worthless, and, every HR employee I’ve ever known sat around eating bon-bons & filing her nails,  how inclined would you be to take such a completely generic statement on a personal level simply because you know or are related to someone who makes a living in that field?

Granted, it’s a slam, but so what.  Aren’t there more pressing matters in your life to expend your energy upon rather than vicarious anger at a flip comment?  Since when did Facebook become your life?

It’s one thing to become offended because you or your own profession has been dissed, or if someone close to you was specifically named & insulted, but to become incensed simply because your friend or family member works in HR?  Pardon me for being a condescending, superior, patronizing, non-team playing, son of a bitch, but, there are about a thousand other issues I’d have a problem with first before I bothered to attempt to own someone else’s anger.

Case in point: The legal profession is constantly dissed by pretty much everyone. Rarely do I ever meet anyone who has not utilized the services of an attorney with a high opinion of legal. Attorneys are always self-serving assholes unless and until they’re needed to get off the hook clients who commit assorted acts of dumbassery.   Indeed, I submit that the legal profession exists in the first place simply because human stupidity is infinite.  If the average person actually read a contract or bothered to understand what they were getting themselves into before they acted,  this would effectively remove the employment from a good portion of the state bar certified bunch.

But just as I don’t sweat scorn that is specific to me, I also don’t waste my time becoming angry over generic opinions expressed by the ignorant & proud of it people.  I just don’t see the point.  How exactly, will my becoming angry help and/or protect the person who was insulted?  And for that matter, how will becoming blistered about being abased directly help and/or protect me?

Bottom line:  It won’t.  The annoyance is all predominantly ego driven, and, round & round we go.  I’m dreadfully sorry to hijack the squall from your spinnaker, but I just have better things with which to occupy my mind.  And If I’m going to allow my ass to become chapped that acutely, then any energy I exert will go towards a constructive end result.  Getting mad enough to open fire on the perp with insults & disparaging commentary in a frenzied attempt to stroke my self-admiration ain’t it.

What’s your opinion?

©2010 Peyton Farquhar™ and Prattle On, Boyo™. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Peyton Farquhar™ and Prattle On, Boyo™ with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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4 Responses to How Judgmental Are You?

  1. lena says:

    First of all, I don’t judge people upon their profession. But then isn’t it kinda hypocritic to judge you upon the field you are working (totally generic one) and not want to be judged upon the field they are working, things they are doing etc (again generic one). How different is what you comment from what the other person comments?

    I don’t usually judge people at all unless I know them very well. But I happen to be judged very often because of my nationality, stupid, eh? I mean not all Russian women are sluts and prostitutes and not all dream to leave country and marry rich abroad but it appears this way when you start to talk to other people. At first I tried to prove my point (as we use to say here “prove that you are not a camel”) but then I thought, why should I? If someone is that stupid, it is sure not my problem, so why should I bother? I know who I am, people who know me, know who I am, rest does not matter.

    • THREE says:

      I wish I could get over that anger-phase-at-being-stereotyped and move on to the “why-should-I-bother”-level as said by lena (highest regard for being able to do that, I have yet to reach that level)… but I honestly can’t help it sometimes.

      I mean, some people (i.e. me) still DO get p*ssed at (negative) stereotyping based on social/demographic parameters – esp. when it comes to touchy subjects like race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, and of course, profession.

      Naturally, still being part-human, I would go and react “Not all commercial-air-hostesses are sl*ts / Not all surgeons are stuckup a-holes / Not all Asians are heartless communists” —all because we’re trying to defend the reputation of a significant person in our life that we care about – no, I don’t like it when what people say implies that my mother is also a sl*t – (otherwise, I doubt if anyone would bother with such comments) – I guess I still haven’t evolved that superlogical part of my brain/heart to detach from all these insignificant phenomena, and still allow my regressively childish emotions to take over sometimes.

      Oh well, that’s just my opinion anyway. I have to really admire Peyton and lena for being able to “(not bother) becoming angry over generic opinions expressed by the ignorant & proud of it people” – I hope I can reach that superlogic level someday. But for now, the emo lives. :p (OK that took a lot of courage to admit)

  2. doctorcrankenstein says:

    Hey Peyton, I know, It’s been a while, I have been without Internet for some time. I’m looking forward to reading through the posts I’ve missed.

    I Too am very opinionated and It gets up a lot of peoples noses. I’m a very passionate person which means I stick by my opinions quite strongly, and this annoys the hell out of a lot of people, particularly if the topic at hand is religion (I’m delivering a talk tomorrow to over 500 people on the topic, wish me luck).

    I don’t understand why people get offended by archetypal images and stereotypes either, particularly if it has nothing to do with them. Everyone makes them, everyone uses them, everyone relates each other back to them. Pop culture THRIVES on them, almost every character in a generic sitcom is a stereotype. Have you heard the one about the Blonde the brunette and the red-head?

    I’m doing an education degree which involves making sweeping generalisations of vast groups of people. It makes It easier to help a student if you have a ‘category’ to place them in and have a set of scenarios for assisting people in that ‘category’.

    I think stereotypes are useful, and entertaining. Taking offence to them is a waste of time and ultimately achieves nothing.

    Nothing is too sacred for humour, We should be able to laugh at each other and ourselves.

    P.S: I, as well as a handful of friends and family members, share your opinion of HR staff entirely 🙂

    • Hey Dr. Crank, long time. Good luck with the speech & thanks for stopping by. Sorry to hear about the Internet problem. Hopefully, it stays connected.

      And thanks to Lena & Three for their comments, as well. Good points made by everyone!

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