Happy Days Are Here Again

With the Congress currently on their annual two week 4th of July vacations, and set to take yet another month long vacation in August, as well as the banking & financial cartels like Goldman Sachs all fat & happily enjoying their million dollar bailout bonuses courtesy of the American taxpayer, I thought I’d take a moment to share with Prattle readers far & wide stories from Main Street, U.S.A., specifically, from my neighborhood.

I live on a rental property in So Cal.  It is a rather nice property with all the usual amenities – hot tub, pool, & fitness center- populated by middle class people.  People of every color with car payments, kids & pets.  Tenants also pay a very nice monthly price tag as well, even during these days of double digit state & national unemployment.

To those who still have jobs, and who get their news exclusively from either Crush Lardass & the insane clown posse and/or the corporately consolidated mainstream press such as Time magazine, CNN, MSNBC, & the local news channel, these folks are blissfully ignorant of the true economic realities of Main Street. Their ‘tude is, Hey, fuck you, you unemployed jerk.  The economy is jus’ fine and yer jus’ laaaazzy.

Meanwhile, the raging wildfire of a collapsing economy that has been burning uncontrollably since 2008 continues to consume everything in its wake as Congressional clowns on both sides of the political aisle fiddle, diddle & take another vacation.  But hey, you say that you still have a job, and have since stopped talking to your friends who have been laid off because they bum you right out, so life is good, right?  Right.  Say it with me…If it’s not  happening to you, then it must NOT be happening!  Yayyyy Lee & Crystal!

OK, hold up.  Pull your head OUT of your ass for just a minute because you need to be made aware of a few things before you return to your own, private La La land with the chocolate milk river and licorice flowers.  Things aren’t getting better, Sparky.  And the economy isn’t recovering no matter how the BLS massages and/or seasonally adjusts and otherwise fudges unemployment statistics.

We are currently in the Great Depression Redux, but since it hasn’t been aired on American fucking Idol, most people with jobs don’t know want to know about it.

Let me give you a very small case in point in the microcosm of my ‘hood. This property I rent…The one that probably sounds to you like it is a palatial estate with servants and complementary hand jobs?  Yes, this particular area of the country (not the property where I live) does have some residents who pay $3k for a plastic shower curtain and drive $65 thousand dollar Humvees, and have otherwise had so much botox and lip augmentation fat transfers into their lips that it’s hard to tell where Vicki’s silicon tits end & Lynne’s mouth begins, but let me just share with you a first.

For some time now, the past 2 years, in fact, there has been a growing number of garbage pickers visiting the property conducting regular reconnaissance missions in search of recyclable materials.  Dumpster divers is how I will refer to them in this particular context.

I am underemployed so I’m home more often than not and I’ve noticed that these dumpster divers don’t just make one trip.  There are three in particular who are here pretty much every other hour picking through the trash receptacles scattered around the property.  Now understand that the supply of recyclable trash is fairly steady, but I don’t know that it warrants multiple trips to the same dumpster on the same day.

But evidently, the pickings must be sweet, otherwise there wouldn’t have been three dumpster divers fighting over who was going to get to pick through the garbage this evening.  That’s right…three smelly, military wannabes in cammie boonie hats fresh from the Army/Navy surplus store with pick up trucks going at it over plastic & glass bottles in a dumpster.

Are you sensing that something is terribly, terribly amiss here?

I don’t live deep in the ‘hood anymore – There aren’t homeless people sleeping on the sidewalk in front of the central library and/or breaking into my car for the spare change in the ashtray.  This is south coast fucking county where people name their kids Chad, Taylor & Tyler & there is an Escalade in the driveway of every about-to-be-foreclosed-upon McMansion.

But then again, the California Redemption Value (CRV) being what it is, I suppose it might be worth it to spend time digging through garbage.  After all, recycling centers pay $0.05 to $0.10 per bottle depending on the size.  If you pick through enough dumpsters, you might actually accrue enough to buy one-tenth of a tank of gas.

We are seven months into the new decade of despair, double digit unemployment, economic & environmental collapse, and your government






You may return to your regularly scheduled fantasyland distractions now.

©2010 Peyton Farquhar™ and Prattle On, Boyo™. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Peyton Farquhar™ and Prattle On, Boyo™ with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.


2 Responses to Happy Days Are Here Again

  1. Deej says:

    Could you please direct me to the nearest distraction, as none of my ‘go to’s’ are currently working at the moment….hmmm, maybe I should go buy a lottery ticket!

  2. Brent Allard says:

    Well said Peyton!

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